DEFINING MANHOOD
Manhood has long been defined by cultural, societal, and familial expectations. It’s often framed around traits like strength, stoicism, independence, and dominance. But these narrow definitions don’t capture the full complexity of what it means to be a man. True manhood is not about fitting into rigid roles; it’s about embracing authenticity, being vulnerable, and finding balance between emotional intelligence and resilience.
At its core, manhood is a personal journey—each man must define it for himself by understanding who he is beyond societal pressures and expectations.
Where Do We Get Our Messaging About Manhood?
From an early age, we’re bombarded with messages about what it means to be a man. These come from:
1. Media: Films, television, music, and advertising often portray men as tough, unemotional, and self-reliant. Heroes in movies rarely cry, and men are usually depicted as either protectors or aggressors.
2. Family and Tradition: Many men inherit beliefs about manhood from their fathers or older male figures. Generations of men have been taught to “man up,” suppress their emotions, and handle everything on their own, passing these ideas down to their sons.
3. Society and Culture: Gender roles in various cultures often reinforce traditional ideas of masculinity. Expectations about how men should behave are deeply embedded in societal norms, leaving little room for emotional vulnerability or expressions of fear, insecurity, or sadness.
These messages teach men that to be emotional is to be weak, and that to show vulnerability is to risk being seen as less of a man.
The Myth of Toxic Masculinity
Toxic masculinity has become a widely discussed topic, often linked to destructive behaviours such as aggression, emotional repression, and dominance over others. However, it’s important to note that masculinity itself is not inherently toxic. The idea of “toxic masculinity” refers to the harmful patterns that some men may fall into due to societal pressures.
The myth around toxic masculinity can sometimes be misunderstood as an attack on all aspects of traditional masculinity, which isn’t the case. There are many positive traits associated with masculinity—strength, leadership, courage, and resilience. The problem arises when these traits are warped by societal pressures, leading men to disconnect from their emotions, suppress vulnerability, or act out in harmful ways.
The true issue is not masculinity itself but the unhealthy expectations placed on men to adhere to certain narrow, outdated roles. This can result in emotional repression, disconnection from others, and difficulties in expressing vulnerability. The solution is not to discard masculinity, but to redefine it in a way that allows men to embrace all aspects of themselves, including their emotional and mental well-being.
Embracing Healthy Masculinity
Healthy masculinity involves balancing strength with empathy, independence with community, and emotional resilience with vulnerability. It means rejecting the idea that being “tough” means suppressing emotions. Instead, it’s about finding the courage to be authentic and building relationships based on trust, connection, and emotional openness.
Through The Work, we aim to challenge these outdated definitions of manhood and create a space where men can redefine masculinity for themselves. By breaking down harmful stereotypes and embracing a fuller, more nuanced understanding of what it means to be a man, we can begin to heal the wounds caused by generations of rigid expectations. The path to healthy masculinity is paved with emotional awareness, community, and the courage to be vulnerable.
